Currently Deb is resting at her mother Diane's house in Tiverton, MA where Amy M. saw her this afternoon. She has got a room at a lovely hospice on the outskirts of Boston. Lots of green trees and lawns to look out on, big brick fireplaces and all the help and support the family and Deb are going to need. If she remains stable, the family will drive her up Friday.
At this stage, its probably best to let the family have some quiet time and we'll desist from the sharing all the hairy details as its gone beyond that. If there are major developments, we'll keep everyone appraised. In the interim, you can assume we're losing a little more of our Deb every day.
Now, it's time for community and we echo Amy, Deb's sister's request for stories and tales about Deb that you'd like to share with her family and friends. The family read the blog daily and gain great comfort from knowing how much Deb is loved and how she's impacted all our lives. It really helps and can definitely make them laugh as well!
38 comments:
Deb,
You have been such an amazing friend to me, we did a lot together! From Proms to New Kids on the block concerts....remember the devil dogs? We used to bomb around in your Impala, then your Beemer, then onto college together, that ride up to FSC was pretty crazy banging around in the back of the van with all of our stuff! You always made time to have fun but also to study....you were always such an intelligent woman...gotta love ya Deb! Deb and I got tattoos together when we were in college (hopefully she doesn't care that I just shared that!) she had the 3 keys to health, wealth and success tattooed on her (i think that's what they stood for) Damn that first key!!!!I remember sleepovers at your house, our first jobs as cashiers at K-Mart....we had fun! Horeseneck beach excursions, of course I could go on and on. You have been a big part of my life, you never forget your best friend from High School, no matter how many years pass! I wish you could know how much you really mean to EVERYONE!!! They say that people/friends come in your life for a season, a reason or a lifetime, I think anyone who knows Deb would say it's for a lifetime!
Love you much!
Nikki
It's a comfort to know Debbie is with her family. I haven't known Deb as long as most of you have though it feels like we've known each other a lifetime. We met about 6 yrs ago at the gym we both worked out at in CT and became workout partners soon after. I had a dog named Nala, so did Deb, we both had the same ugly pink alarm clock in our bedrooms, we were just meant to be friends. I couldn't sew for beans Deb did beautifully. She made me a beautiful quilt from some squares of material I'd collected at a Christmas swap one year, in turn I cleaned her house in New London several times. I don't need to tell you I think I got the better end of the deal! To Debbie and her family May God bless you and keep you in his loving care and Debbie the world's a better place because of people like you.
Love Mary
I am glad that suck is back in and how about the one that rhymes with same - well here goes nothing - FUCK CANCER!
Debbie and family - you are in the hearts and minds of so many people and I fervently hope that you find comfort there - in the arms of the angels ,yes?
Thru this ordeal and these many postings it seems that this family will take very good care of one another as things go forward.
"Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance."
And for all who have seen Debbie's Elaine from Seinfeld dance, well that is what I am talking about! :).
God bless Debbie and this incredible family.
Barbara
Debbie's step-brother passed away around 6:00 p.m. Eastern this evening. For those of you who don't know, he was diagnosed with a gbm last August and didn't quite make it as long as Deb. It's going to be a tough month for the family, but thanks to everyone for all your kind words and prayers.
Dear Deb,
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. You are and have been a wonderful friend to Amy. You are appreciated and much loved.
Lida Cavanaugh
I'm sorry for your loss. It's crazy to know that such a horrible disease has affected not only 1 special person in your lives, but 2. May God bless you and give you the strength you need during this trying time.
Donna:)
Debbie,
The posse is coming tomorrow so you hang on friend! We'll be there to put a smile on your face and paint your toes -that'll be me and Jana again since Amy isn't really a foot girl, as you know. We love you so much, Debbie. And we will certainly dance with you again.
All our love and friendship - Carrie, Amy, Jana, Anita, Lisa and Joann!
Deb & Family,
My prayers go out to you all during this difficult time, I am so sorry for your loss, it is unbelievable that you have all been affected by this F-IN Cancer like this! Love and prayers to you all.
Love,
Nikki
Yep, I agree with everything everyone has said. The quote that keeps popping into my head is something St. Paul said to St. Timothy. "I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith". So much for my fundamentalist upbringing - my mother will be proud.
Deb - So many things about you drew me in to be your friend - contagious laughter, the ability to laugh at yourself, mentoring skills, "alimentary humor" (as my mother calls potty humor), dog love, your insane laugh, your gastronomic capabilities, and the fact that you just let me be me. I've only met a few people with such a remarkable fight inside them, and fewer still with such a mission in their mind. May the lives you touch bear you softly, my friend.
-Peace-
Mollie May
Deb and Family,
Our thoughts and prayers are with you all. We are so sorry for your loss.
Deb you are such remarkable woman and have touched so many lives in such a positive way.We have been blessed by your friendship. You are a one of a kind neighbor and friend and we will cherish all the times we spent together. Larry learned how to quilt with you and so enjoyed learning. Sharing meals, yard work and catching up on our weeks together was such a pleasure. You were there to help us with Duncan,Smokey and Pumpkin when my mom passed away and I thank you for the peace of mind that gave me at such a difficult time in my life. Larry always enjoyed his Joey time when you were away. You were so happy when you brought Nala in to your family and again when you brought Radar home. I think your love for animals matched mine. You are with us always in our hearts.
Our love to you and your family,
Larry and Priscilla
I just wanted to let everyone know that Debbie has kept her sense of humor all along this fight. Just last week she was making fun of me for wearing "Talbots"....she couldn't beleive I would wear such "mom clothing". Her humor will always remain in my heart.
-Marianne (Debbie's sister in law)
Debbie,
To my Gemini partner in crime - since we were both 5'9" and up, and equally gregarious, those teams we worked on together when we met many years ago never really had a chance when we were in the room! I loved having a friend who had an equivalent clothes additction who gave me frequent (and unsolicited) hair and accessory advice… You'd be so proud, I’ve grown my hair out and I even blow dry the roots upside-down now -- "You need a little lift Alicyn, at your roots!” she’d harass me almost every morning.
From our re-org dish-sessions to the photos I took of you in my living room for your ‘bachelor’ tryout!!! (I still think the one with you and Brendan in the clown wig was my favorite), I feel so blessed to have such an awesome friend. Who else understood the gravity that ensued every mercury in retrograde? Stormed into my office saying “uh oh – have you read this month’s horoscope yet”? Gave such hysterical grooming advice? It was so easy to like you - even when you were always complaining you needed to gain weight when everyone else was so desperate to loose it! I missed our Olio ‘co-birthday’ lunch celebration this year, but still feel lucky we fit it in for your 35th!
You are so couragous Debbie, and so amazing! I feel like you have given me much more than I had a chance to give you back, with our time being cut too short. I love you.
xxxooo
Alicyn
For all bloggers,
I want to share one of my favorite books with you. It's called "Born Knowing" by author John Holland. I believe it could bring many of you a great deal of comfort during this difficult time. It's definitely NOT TOO SOON to pick up this book. John is a world-renowned psychic medium who communicates with people who have "crossed over." What he shares in his book can really help people process this kind of loss.
I will share with you that I had a private reading/ sitting with John in 2004 at a critical point when my entire life was blowing up/ blowing apart in ways many could not fathom....I was in a great deal of danger. What he had to tell me that day didn't make a lot of sense in that moment, but it made a great deal of sense later. The opportunity to experience his gift first hand is something I still treasure with extreme gratitude 4 years later.
I've also seen him perform live demonstrations of his gift.....truly amazing. He is often on tour throughout the US and beyond. If you ever have an opportunity to go to one of his events, I'm quite certain that Debbie will be there, quite literally.
His book is an amazing gift. It teaches us how to re-frame this type of loss. It is a quick read. You will likely have trouble putting it down, whether you are spiritually minded or not.
I cried hard this morning when I read the update. It is hard to believe. I share your disbelief and grief.
I also know that Debbie's spirit is really strong and vibrant, and she is going to shine on and on beyond. She has affected so many lives in such a positive way.
Best beacons,
Bea (Karin)
Here is John's web site.
http://www.johnholland.com/
He seens to make some regular appearances in Massachusetts. He grew up in Dorchester,MA so likely still has lots of roots in New England.
Beacons........
Diane,
Thank you so much for opening up your home to us today so we could visit Deb. It was quite comforting to know that she seemed so peaceful at home with you. We were so happy that she recognized all of us and we could spend just a little more time with her sharing our stories of all the fun times we have had together. As a mother myself, it is hard to comprehend what you are going through and I am impressed by the strength that you have. A mother's love is a powerful force. We could tell that Deb feels your love for her because throughout our time spent with her today, she was keenly aware of your presence. May God continue to give you the strength you need as you care for your daughter.
Our love and prayers are with you,
Jana, Amy, Carrie, Lisa, Joann, and Anita
Ok so I keep thinking of funny Debbie stories in California, so I hope you don't mind I am sharing, I hope you can get a little chuckle...
Several years ago Debbie and I went to a "White Trash" themed party in Palm Springs, CA. But in preparation for the big bash we had to go shopping for new outfits. Not just anywhere, but to the cheesiest, dirtiest thrift store in town. She went aisle by aisle skipping because she was so happy to dress all of us in her lovely outfit creations. She did our hair because it wasn't teased enough, make-up was not thick enough, fake tattoos, etc. (something about comparing to NJ?)
After several hours, whoops I mean beers, she had almost the entire party around the pool doing dance routines, such as the hedge trimmer, moving the lawn, the sprinkler, weed wacker, just to name a few. Her skinny arms and legs swinging everywhere! She was the dancing Home Depot Queen!
I will try to locate the picture of us and send it to Amy D to share.
Kimmie
I shared an office with Deb for a while at City of Hope. I knew her for a few years. I fondly remember Deb's dances, especially the sprinkler. And the Elaine dance. Deb knew every diet known to man and convinced me to try a few of them in my quest to lose weight. I'll always think I need to pair a protein with a carb because she drilled it in my head. I got my first tattoo with Deb. It was at some guy's house. She insisted it was safe. So far I've tested negative for hepatitis so I guess she was right. She got her "keys" touched up, I got my four leaf clover. I remember her laughing at me as I sobbed when the needle came near me. She promised me a quilt when my daughter was born 5 years ago, but then she moved. I wish I'd bugged her to follow through, Deb's quilts were hard to come by, now I know they are doubly cherished. I had so many fun times with her, and I'm so sad the world is losing such an amazing person. Please send Deb my love. She is very loved. All the girls at City of Hope have her in their thoughts and prayers.
Love,
Raechelle (Rachel) Tinsley
I pray that you DO go gentle into that good night as you have raged against the dying of your light for a long time now Debbie. Be at peace and at rest and know that you are cherised by so many. Your brave struggle and positivity have
inspired even those in the outer most reaches of your amazing circle. You have always been able to dance as if no one was watching (even as you hoped that all of us were!)
God bless.
I can't express how much you have touched my life in the past few months Debbie. Between our conversations about nutrition, rekki, hotdogs, skinny 'chicken legs', and meeting for lunch off campus, I can't help but smile thinking of the laughs.
Debbie you taught me that it was important to laugh at myself first before anyone else can. How right you are! If I laugh at myself first, I will always be the first to do something! =)
My husband and I even have a little dance we do, just to lighten the mood and to make people look at us and say, 'wow they are retarded'. LOL
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during such difficult times. I think you can see that everyone loves you dearly and that you are a true inspiration to all of us!
Stay fabulous Debbie!
Debbie,
To me, you will always be the fun-loving, office-dancing, silly, animal-loving, wonderful, smart, inspiring woman that you are. Thank you for also showing me that the company of dogs is truly a blessing and converting me to a cat and dog-person. Your urging us to adopt Indigo was the best advice I've ever received!
Thank you Debbie!!!
Michelle
I worked with Debbies at City of Hope. And had the honor of workign with her seh made all of us laugh with her great stories and the dancing in the office was the best as she taught us all the dances her humor and love of live is contagious.... all my love to her family your love for her is amazing she spoke of all of you often when she worked with us.
Laura
(coh)
Debbie and Family,
My thoughts and prayers are with each and every one of you during this difficult time.
I am very sorry to hear about the loss of Betty's son. I can't imagine what you all are going through. I just wanted you all to know that I am thinking about you and praying for you all.
Debbie, I have very special Christmas eve memories fighting with you over who gets to be Santa! Laughing at your dads choice of trees, and taking the entire night to finally start having fun and then it being time to go and not wanting too!
Debbie, you are a true inspiration, such a strong, funny, person...stay strong at heart and know that I am thinking of you alot - Love you dearly!!!!!
Galynn
Deb-
I have been keeping up with your updates over the years and have been keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. You are an awesome person and I feel privileged in working with you back in the PPD/Pfizer days. I will always remember the BBQ "eat offs" and the good times we had.
Mike
"If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
'Til I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love, Me."
(Lyrics from Love Me, Collin Raye)
When you think of me, grieve not, Nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk Of me as if I were beside you there. And when you recall those things I loved, please do not let the thought of me be sad...For I am loving you just as I always have...You were so good to me! There is so much I could have told you, but remember this: I loved you so-'twas heaven here with you!
From reading everyone's comments, I can see that Deb has not changed in the 18 years I have known her no matter who she became friends with or where she lived. She came into college the dancing queen that she is....she did the best "running man" out of all of us who hung around in college, had the best nutritional adivse for anyone who gained the "freshman 15" (and then some), knew just what to wear as well as how to style your hair. Her sincerity and devotion to her friends was ever present even as she traveled to England for a semester abroad, throughout my leave from dorm living when I did my student teaching, and after we graduated. I had the opportunity to live with Debbie and Amy M. for a while while we all worked in Boston, and I enjoyed her friendship then just as much, if not more, than when we were in college. "Train Man" was our favorite person to stare at when commuting on the train, God was he handsome!!! And we had some great times at Center Field with new friends too. When Deb decided to move to CA, I traveled with her for her interviews. We rented a car to drive up to San Francisco from San Diego and when the rental man told us the car didn't have heat, she convinced me that we didn't need it in sunny CA. For any of you who have traveled down the PCH late at night/early morning in early spring, you know that heat comes in handy. We ended up paying almost $12 for one grilled cheese sandwich as dinner that night and rented the seediest hotel room to get just a few hours of sleep before continuing our trip back down to San Diego. I was sad to see my friend move so far away, but that is Debbie, always up for an new adventure. It is apparent that she has touched so many people's lives. With so many people thinking of you and praying for you, Deb, know that you are surrounded (be it in spirit or in person) by hundreds of people who love you. You are a one of a kind friend! Love you lots!
Donna:)
I was long winded last time, so I'll make this one short. :) Deb, I just saw Richard Simmons on the news and couldn't help remembering "Sweating to the Oldies" together in the 5B Suite!!! :)
Donna:)
Oh, I have pictures of that! (the sweatin to the oldies) and I will be sending them to Amy D. for her collage....Deb definitely tried to get us all to exercise in college....we all look so young in the pictures....too funny! When I would speak to Deb, if she was leaving a job or something, I would always say, hey.....why not move to florida, I'm sure you could get a job here....I wanted her to be near me, I missed all the fun we used to have, she sure is a contagious person, you just gotta love her! Love ya Deb!
Nikki
It is so great all you are continuing to post your memories of Deb.I hope that you all remember to also post your name to help us identify her friends she has so many.We as a family are doing as well as we can under these circumstances,Thank you all SO MUCH!!!!!
Debbie big_deb little debbie 'don't mock me Deb' winner of so many 'tough guy' contests - with the sunroof open in the freezing cold of winter - and maker of so many more hijinx and good memories that it's not funny, you're #1 in my book.
As you taught me: "that's my story, and I'm sticking to it!"
Look for a card in the mail, too, cuz you know me. Best - Jeff
Debbie was taken by ambulance this afternoon to The Tippett House hospice in Needham, MA. She was having trouble waking up and moving her body. She really hasn't been eating and my mom hasn't been able to get her to take her anti-seizure medicine. My mom felt that Debbie was getting a little uncomfortable at her house. At least they can give her pain meds at the hospice to keep her comfortable.
Thanks for all the stories and kind notes. We are all so lucky to have such a wonderful person in our lives, even if for just a short while longer.
Diane,
You took very good care of Deb at your house. I would bet she was glad to be with you at home during the past week spending lots of Mom/daughter time with you! This decision must have been very hard for you and probably weighs heavy on your heart. But know she loves you very much.
May God give you strength at this time.
From your West Coast Daughter
Debbie,
I miss making dinners with you and having someone to split all of the meals with. It was so much fun cooking at your house and then having food for the entire week. And how we always talked about food. I enjoyed watching Patti do all of the feng shui stuff for your home, and how much better you felt after your home was all set up. I loved your stories about you and Radar, and I miss that portrait in the hallway of you and Joey. It always made me smile. I miss how we would watch Vic and Nala play with each other while Radar watched them from behind the screen door. Gateau misses how you would come over and feed him while I was away. I was supposed to learn how to sew from you, remember? You have always been so generous and loving with us. We love you so much and send you Light.
We send lots of love and support to Deb's family, and hold all of you close to our hearts.
Margaret, Jake, Vic, and Gateau
Hi Debbie and family,
I have two stories that I would like to share. The first I believe it was when her brother Danny graduated high school and we went to their house for a party afterwards. She had just come seeing the movie “Fire Starter” starring Drew Barrymore. Well she had my whole family in hysterics as she sat in the kitchen and told us about the movie scene by scene, almost line by line. When she mentioned how the girl cried and did a huge sniffle, of course Debbie did a huge sniffle. She knew all the details to the movie including how that family even had the same vacuum as they did. It was quite an amazing recap that when I saw it playing on TV years later, I just had to sit down and watch it.
The second story is from when she used to babysit my daughter who is now twenty. Debbie (major Red Sox fan) would watch the games and always cheered on Jody Reed. It was to the point whenever my daughter saw baseball on TV she would shout out “Jody Reed” in her three year old voice. We just couldn’t have baseball on without hearing Jody Reed’s name!
Pat and family,
Mattapoisett
Deb's Family,
What is the visting schedule for Deb at Hospice?
Your in my thoughts always
Mary
Deb was in a little pain today so they gave her some Morphine. She still seems to recognize people when they visit and talk to her although she isn't speaking much.
There are no real visiting hours at Tippett Home... please just use your best discretion but Deb spends a lot of time resting.
We all appreciate the comments and stories being posted. Thanks for all your positive thoughts and prayers in this tough time for our family.
Deb - the first time we met you were shooting hoops in your dad's yard. Your sister had just done me the favor of an introduction to her blonde friend Julie. As the girls freshened up as girls will do, you spoke with an insight to life and an intelligence that surpassed your mere 20 years.
The next summer, with Amy sis again as chaperone, I had the pleasure of providing you your first legal US beer. Ah, 21!
Yet by then you'd already rowed the Thames, quaffed a pint with the locals, and seen the sights of Londontown.
Not ever late to the race, and self-described as a 'new soul', as I read this blog it is so very clear that you inspire people wherever you go. You remind folks of their potential, they who might feel down from their once-around-the-block, or their karma if you will, or whatever it might be that's tugging and detracting. Ah, you!
In so many lives there might be two or three days, one magical month, a honeymoon, a birth, or a period of artistic creativity, a phase of sunshine remembered, or maybe a special pilgrimage treasured. Yet in reading this blog it seems that one might look back and just maybe cobble together one week of odd days per year that weren't grade-A US prime. It is evident that the rest of the time, your time, has been dross turned to gold, effortless.
Whether it's been beef, tofu, greens and rice or Fenway Franks, you bring magic to life and have been unhesitating in sharing this wealth.
Thanks, kid. You are that one in a million! - Jeff L
HI Deb!
To you and your family, I want you to know you are in my prayers. I remember you and your strenuous workouts at the old Powerhousd Gym. Thanks for sharing the running program with me even though I eventually gave up on it. We miss you at the gym.
God Bless you and your family.
Mike R.
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